Tuesday, March 30 We didn’t get a chance to post Monday’s blog yet (it’s now Tuesday 6:35PM our time) so we will post Monday and Tuesday at the same time. My , what a difference a day makes. A new list of obstacles making this whole ordeal look impossible to accomplish. John and I talked about not blogging today – and just leave folks with the “isn’t that so sweet” post from Monday afternoon’s visit. This whole process is the pits. They have shown us a boy, Kirill, and now it looks as if it will be very difficult process to have a judge in court say “yes” to. And he is old enough to know that he is spending time with us because we want him to be a part of our family. He is old enough at 5 years or age to know.
It looks like our best chance to have success in court is for us to be able to locate this boy’s birthmother who has not been seen since last July. Again, we will leave out any further details but I just have to say that I am feeling much like I did about a month after Brady was born when things started quieting down and people quit coming around and I felt like the Enemy was saying, “What are you going to do once people STOP praying?” Fear and doubt are creeping in. We are so tired. This has been a 31 plus month nightmare and the end does not appear to be in sight. What we are looking at now is continuing to bond and enjoy this little boy (who is referring to us to others as mama and papa) for another 9 or 10 days, wait for however long they say wait, and go to court where there is a great chance that this judge will deny our request to adopt. But how do you work at something for this long, investing so much emotionally and financially and QUIT when there is still some possibility of a good outcome?
On a lighter note (I’m not feeling “light” but John thought it would be a good addition) we did meet a new interpreter who looks like Cameron Diaz that may be replacing Zhanat. Gulnara seems to have a better working relationship with her since she has more experience in doing international adoptions. She offerred to take us to church on Easter Sunday so that is something we can look forward to. Sorry to be so hum-drum in my writing. We are missing our family at home and wondering what all of this is for? We covet your prayers.

Monday, March 29th - 5th TIMES A CHARM!
10AM – Arrive at babyhouse this a.m. via taxi with Zhanat. Slip in the back door, off with our boots and coats, up the stairs to retrieve the key to unlock the bonding room, slip on our crocks, down the hall to Kirill’s room and learn that his class is in the music room for what looks like music and exercise. Kirill smiles a little when he sees us but stays back in his line. We sit at the end of the room and cheer on the children as they race around the cones for exercise. It was a great opportunity for us to get to experience a little bit of what life in the orphange is like for him. The “house” is very clean, very nice. This music class for 8 kids had one teacher and a second woman who played the piano for them. We return to the regular classroom and I give the “teacher” a stuffed bunny and babydoll for the kids in the class to keep and enjoy. All the children run to us for hugs and attention and John notices Kerill push two boys away from John. He follows us down to the bonding room but the next 1 ½ hours are a struggle. He seems more distant today than on Saturday. He is smiling some but not as interested in engaging with us as before. What if this little guy doesn’t want to have us as parents? Actually we left from the babyhouse wondering how 9 ½ more days of this are going to accomplish this trying to make a connection thing. How do you get close to a 5 yo that you cannot talk with or who does not really understand what is about to happen?
12:15 PM John and I eat by ourselves near the university where Zhanat works. We are meeting with Zhanat at 2 to have some documents notarized. Feeling kind of down. Keep thinking of the “how do you eat an elephant?” analogy someone just shared – this whole process is so long and when you feel like you’ve made some progress and reached some big milestones, you look up and see you still have quite a monster to work through.
4PM - Our 5th visit with Kirill. He is waking up from a nap when we enter his room (these 15 children live out of essentially 2 rooms – the bedroom with 15 beds for sleeping and a 2nd room where they play and eat). Kirill seems happier to come with us this afternoon and holds John’s hand down the hall to our bonding room. The two workers who were in the bonding room doing paperwork this morning (we think they were checking us out!) were not there for our second visit so we are more relaxed having him to ourselves. We play with cars and blocks and bubbles…. And then we discover THE BIG BEACH BALL. Kirill steps up on a small ledge and leaps onto this ball that is as tall as he is. John grabs him at his waiste and dips the ball in all directions while Kirill squeals with laughter and excitement. He rolls off and leaps again. And he does this over and over and over again. (We’re thinking that this would be a great time to have Brady and Cooper along to let these old people sit a spell and rest!) Anyway, he is ALL boy and he is absolutely eating up the physical affection and all this attention. It is such a beautiful sound to hear him squeal and laugh. He and John both work up a sweat and then Kirill crawls in my lap while we look at some books. (One book is in Spanish and one in German, left behind by other adoptive parents is my guess). He is talking all kinds of Russian naming animals and toys, ect. as I ask him “Shto-eta?” (how do you say that in Russian?) One of the books had a mirror inside and when I saw Kirill look at himself, I said Scott –Kirill. It was like introducing himself to his new self as Scott with his new mother looking over his shoulder. We said our goodbyes with hugs and with Zhanat’s prompting, Scott said “Bye” for the first time. I watched him run down the long hall to his classroom door and he stopped before entering and turned and waved. It was really sweet and it was the turning point for us with him as a family.
As we look back on the morning, John and I think that being in the music room, the same room we were in when we first met Kirill and the other little girl when we were trying to choose our chld, was making him feel as if he was still in the running for being “chosen” all over again. We had just given stuffed animals to other kids in his class and cheered them all on as he stood by and watched. It hit us that our little guy was not feeling so secure in his place as our son. Until this afternoon. Now we think he knows and I think that he likes the idea a lot! We’ve still got a hunk of elephant to eat to get through 10 more days of bonding, up to a week (or longer) before going to court (which we’ve been told has no guarantees in the judges decision), then deciding if John and I will both return home and have an escort bring him home (if that will even be a possible option) or If I will stay and bring him home or go home with John and fly back several weeks later to bring him home. We’ll just take one day at a time and today was a great one!

Sunday, March 28 Day of Rest (no babyhouse visit)– We would love to have gone to the Mennonite church for worship this Palm Sunday morning, but no way to get there. We are still too chicken to call a taxi and ask them to take us somewhere by ourselves (possibly because we can’t speak or SPELL the Cyrillic language). Other than City Mall, Café Karagady, Ankara Café, and Shapagat, I cannot remember the accurate names of any place we have visited. Our brains have been through so much stuff in the last 12 days they are absorbing LESS than usual, and for me anyway, that’s not too conducive for learning Russian and how to get about in a foreign place.
The weather is the coldest so far (about 14 degrees F plus the wind ripping). We have thought many times how grateful we are that Cooper is not with us on this difficult trip. Had we let go of her hand outside today, she would have blown away for sure! It was much warmer here on the first couple days of Spring (last week) and many people had shovels out breaking through layers of ice so that the sidewalks could dry. There was a lot of slush and little rivers to step over as the weather warmed. Now it’s all frozen over again and more challenging to walk on. We have not witnessed a single person, other than John, slip and fall. Clearly we must waste too much rock salt at home on our sidewalks!
We did venture out beyond our regular stops today. It’s less intimidating to explore new places when you are traveling with a group of people. With more than two you can laugh at each other. Because of our brightly colored coats EVERYONE knows we don’t belong. Today, we didn’t let it stop us from seeing new sites. We found a couple of new market/malls where “normal” people shop. City Mall is more on the expensive end of everything and since we are here longer than anticipated we want to hang on to our cash. We actually interacted with a couple of store clerks today who were helpful. We bought Kirill (I’ll feel comfortable calling him Scott once he has fully embraced us as mom and dad and knows we would like to change his name) a long sleeve shirt . We’re looking for race cars or a game we can take and play with during our visiting hours. Since he is one of the older children at this babyhouse many of the toys are for younger kids.
I completed 3 hours of physical therapy C.M.E.’s today and John almost completed his practice ortho in-training exam during our down time. We’re drilling each other on our Russian phrases (our last day with our translator (until he joins us in court) is this Tuesday) so we’re feeling a greater urgency to be able to communicate – important words for a 5yo like, Tee ho-chesh pee-sit “Do you want to go pee?” Tonight we will make our regular run to the Café Karagandy to check e-mails and blog. We really need to push ourselves to do more than smile and point when we are there. We see the same young waitress almost everyday and still don’t know her name? Maybe tonight we’ll introduce ourselves and ask her Kak-vahs zavut? (what is your name?)
Pictures: It’s laundry day (no washer/dryer here, nor laundromat), actually dryers are rare here.

Saturday, March 27 - I don’t think that you can do this adoption thing, as a Christian, and not see the incredible parallels of parents pursuing a child to adopt into a family and our Heavenly Father pursuing his children to adopt into His family. Perhaps because our own adoption journey has been such a long and difficult one, it makes me appreciate being adopted into God’s family all the more! I am so grateful that our Father is relentless in pursuing his children, even when we turn from Him. It hit me hard in that first room at Cool-in-shock Orphanage, as we sat behind a desk like some sort of judge watching while these precious and innocent children were brought before us to be chosen (or not). I am no theologian, but I know, I know, I know that when the scriptures say that we are predestined and chosen, that there is more to this than some list God holds up checking off just the ones He desires to call his family. The call to come and join His family MUST be for all. None of these kids (especially the ones we said no to), deserve to live a life without a family. What John and I were asked to do in that room (and in each of the babyhouse rooms), to look upon innocent children and DECIDE who is worthy to be in our family is NOT a process I can ever picture my Abby Daddy doing. All are worthy in His eyes BECAUSE of what His Son has done. (Ok, getting heavy here but this has been intense and emotional.)
I hope that I never forget the beautiful picture played out before us yesterday afternoon on our second visit as John and I, the hopeful parents who are in pursuit of this little orphan boy, open the door into his playroom and call out his name. And he runs to us, not cooerced by his teachers, but willingly he runs and stands close beside us, not yet knowing us but trusting us. We learned today that he told his friends in his room last night that “my mama and papa are coming back for me tomorrow .” How much is that like our God who calls out to each one of us, “Come to me child and I will be your Abba daddy and you will be part of my family and share all of my inheritance.” How could anyone pass up our Father’s invitation to do life with Him?? This little boy will be giving up all that is familiar to him in his little babyhouse, his teachers/nurses, the 14 other children in his room. He sleeps in a very clean room with 8 beds lined up in a row on one wall and 7 beds on the other. (Kirill’s bed is by the window and radiator.) I really cannot imagine what the process looks like for 15 children, ages 3-6, to crawl in bed and go to sleep each night. I just know that it is void of parents to love on them before they close their eyes. Yet in this child’s willingness to leave the familiar life he knows and to begin a new life with his new family – his life will be changed forever – and he will inherit all that his new family has to offer. Pretty cool, huh?
10AM we had our 2nd day of bonding, this time with just me and John, Kirill and Zhanat. They have shown us where to obtain a key to the bonding room each day and we are now allowed to enter the babyhouse (without supervision) for our visits, go to the children’s room and call for Kirill and go into the bonding (good size play room loaded with toys probably donated from adoptive parents in the past) to play. Again, as soon as we opened the door to his classroom, Kirill runs to us, still clutching the big stuffed teddy bear we gave him yesterday. You can tell he feels proud to be singled out. All of the children come toward us, smiling, and reaching. I squat down and give hugs and “Preeviet” (hello) to as many as I can touch and then we are asked to leave his room. The worker says that it is too difficult for these children to become attatched to visiting parents because they all want to be chosen. (How does that grab your heart?) Kirill is fast with the puzzles and Lego’s. If something doesn’t fit or work he quickly adjusts and tries again. John brought along a flashlight that is fastened to a headband strap (for hiking) and Kirill gets a kick out of wearing this. The parrot puppet that squeaks (thank you, Kyle) is a hit as are the bubbles. Spending 2 hours in a room with a 5 yo that does not speak your language and with no other children along to interact with is a little bit of a challenge. We should be good and bonded after doing this twice a day for 14 days (MINUS Saturdays which is only once per day and Sunday which we will not visit but count as a day). We are required to take a picture of us with Kirill each day to show our judge at court. This morning, he is wearing what he had on yesterday morning so don’t think it will be a big problem on which days of bonding are which (for pictures sake).
THE NAME: Most of you know this, but Scott, the name we have chosen to call this little boy, is my brother’s name, who lost his battle to cancer last July. It was after lunch yesterday, after having made our decision to adopt this little boy, that John said, “Let’s name him Scott.” Still tear up when I write this, but this really excites me. Scott and I talked a lot during our adoption journey. As much crap (there’s really not a pretty or proper word to describe what we’ve been through) as we’ve endured in our adoption pursuit, it never compared with all that Scott endured as he fought so hard to beat his lymphoma. Yet, Scott always had words to encourage us and scripture to strengthen us, never trivializing what we were going through. I cannot think of a better way to honor someone I love so much and if this little guy has any of the zest for life, the humor, and the love for people that his uncle Scott had, he will be an amazing kid! So we won’t be calling him Faith but he is named after an incredible guy with an incredible faith. I love you, Scott.
Hey we just found out (thank you, Jamie) that the name Kyrill is the name of one of the two brothers who brought Christianity to the Slavik people in the ninth century. So there you have it –
SCOTT KIRILL KING.

Friday, March 26th So what did YOU do on your vacation this year??? We are up at 6:30AM and able to call and say “hi” to Cooper and to Tucker. We both wake feeling like we will be heading home after today, wondering what we’re going to do with a suitcase full of babyhouse worker gifts, ect. that we brought to give away.
10:00 – We head by taxis to the first of two babyhouses (“Cool-in-shock where we were yesterday is for older children who have aged out of the actual babyhouses). The first is Shapagat baby house (the same babyhouse that Tina , our friend from home got her little girl.) John and I were to fly with her to Kaz September ‘08. She went and we did not. Just before we left home on this trip, Tina brought us a small photo album full ofpictures of her Kaz daughter and many of the different workers from this babyhouse (along with newer pictures of Lily). So we began our “meeting” with theSkapagat staff with a presentation of Tina’s photo album and immediately there was smiles and laughts. Thank you, Tina! (Truly the entire atmosphere in this place is warm and inviting and with smiles). We were asked if we also would consider seeing boys and we said “yes.”
We were moved into the playroom (bonding room, maybe?) and waited. The problem with not speaking Russian is that John and I will sit with a smile on our face trying to look like “good little prospective parents” while there is quite an exchange of words about us being made. And we haven’t a clue if they are saying “We will take them out and hang them by their toes and shoot them” until AFTER Zhanat turns to us and translates In English (– just a little stressful.)
First they carry in an adorable 3yo girl who is understandably shy. We are told about her history and that she is “normal.” When she was asked to walk, it appears she has much difficulty due to some spactic muscles and weakness. She is able to crawl and has to crawl up/down stairs as well. At the same time this girl is in the room they bring in a little boy who turned 5 in January. It was not clear for several minutes if he was in the room because he was being shown to us for adoption. When we learn that he, too, is available John sat on the floor near him and starts rolling balls back and forth with him while I continue to hold the little girl.
I’m so mentally wiped right now I’ll just cut to the chase. Thank you, Lynn Sargent for your e-mail advise which most likely saved our adoption chances. And Lynn, as you once said, “Bobby, IT’S A BOY!” - We would like to introduce to you the newest addition of the King family…. SCOTT KIRILL KING (not sure about the spelling of Kirill, the boy’s Russian name he now goes by). He is 2 months older than Cooper and will go off to kindergarden in the fall with his sister (possibly not understanding a word his teacher has to say!). We are happy. It feels right and good. Thought we were here for a girl. After making our decision on this little guy, we see that we really just want a child to add to our family to love on and to love us. When we went back to the babyhouse after lunch and the door to his classroom was opened, he RAN to our side with a smile without even being asked. That’s a very nice start for our 14 day bonding process that has started TODAY. Thank you to all who have been faithful to pray. Luanne, your e-mail we received on Wednesday was prophetic. Yes, Friday not Thursday ( we wondered why you wrote Friday) is the turning point of our journey and bonding has begun. There is a Kazakh saying that has held true for us – that after 3 “troubles” all else will be easy/smooth. Easy and smooth sound good right now.
Enjoy the pictures. They say he looks like his mama (me!) and right now he is warming up to me more as well (big switch from our first days with Cooper when she would not let her mama touch her!).

Thursday, March 25 – Minutes until Gulnara calls for us to meet her downstairs of our apartment for our 2nd walk to the babyhouse (6 days after our first attempt). Isa 26:3 You will keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, steadfast because I trust in you. Trust in the Lord forever. The Lord is the rock eternal. 8 Yes, Lord, walking in the ways of your laws we wait for you; your name and your renown are the desires of our hearts. (Thank you, Mary S. for the scripture!) Honestly, I feel very nervous and sick, perhaps like labor pains as John’s sister described. I feel as if I have been “pregnant” with this child in my heart for 2 ½ years. And we now have our bags packed (big teddy bear for child, bubbles, camera, passports) ready to head to the hospital (babyhouse). The labor has been long and difficult and we have been told months before that our child has some problems. None of that has mattered once we believed in our hearts that she is the child God has picked out for us. Soon we will learn if they will even allow us in to see her. We are wishing that we could be more excited and less apprehensive. Do not worry about anything. Instead pray about everything. Tell God your needs and don’t forget to thank Him for His answers. Help us Holy Spirit, we cannot stand up without You. Go before us know and be in this place working mightily on our behalf.
10:05 AM We arrive at the babyhouse. Our translator is on his way to babyhouse by taxi and so John and I sit in an office with Gulnara, 2 babyhouse doctors, 2 babyhouse office staff and 2 offic ials from the Office of Education (representatives who were not available when we came the week before). Because we have no translator all officials decide to leave and come back when Zhanat has arrived (about 10:35). Much exchange in Russian going on which we are clueless about. The same 2 babyhouse people from the Friday night meeting that didn’t go so well are present. One of the Office of Education persons has a notebook with a list of the children’s names who are at our orphanage (Cool –in –shock) and also on the database available for adoption. Evidently the staff does NOT know which of their children are able to be adopted. We realize that we will be seeing one child at a time, between ages 3-6 (we are approved to adopt a child between 2-6). With 10 of us adults sitting in chairs/behind desks across from each other, a small child is led in by the hand, one at a time, and stands before us. We are allowed to ask questions – all while the chlld stands in front of us.
One is a 3 yo Russian girl who seems spunky and smart. She sings a song and walks across the small room to receive a piece of candy someone gives her. Then Zhanat leans toward us and translates that this child is positive for AIDS. Another Russian girl, who is 4 comes in with a bilateral cleft, both eyes crossed and with other problems. Both are cute but we do not feel that either one is ours. The first child they bring in (before the above 2) is actually the one that we had heard about before coming, the little one that Gulnara had met in December and again last month. We knew that she had a diagnosis of cerebral palsy and we said that we were good with that provided that she was mentally on the normal level so that we would not have a second child who will need to be dependent on others forever. Don’t know how to put this in words, but this precious girl, was so much more involved with her impairments than we had prepared ourselves for. She was very shy and so it was difficult to tell if her head hanging down was due to her CP or to her being bashful. She is able to walk, but her gait is difficult and slower (again no big problem). ALL her movements are slower and with effort. All four extremities seem to have a dyskonetic, weakness. We ask if we can spend more time with the child (actually wanted to observe her with other children but this was declined). We go into a music hall and watch her nurse/teacher ask her to manipulate colored puzzles, ect. She makes eye contact with us but is slow to connect and focus. When John shows her pictures of our family, she makes efforts to repeat the names – her words with effort and slowed. We continue to try and learn the doctor’s thoughts on this child’s prognosis. Without question, she will continue to show improvement with ongoing speech and occupational and physical therapy. She will need special education classes. God you’ve got to show us what we are to do here. The only thing that John and I are feeling is FEAR – overwhelming fear. And feeling that this whole process is so inhumane. What are these children thinking at these ages standing on display? I would not have CHOSEN to take on the responsibilities of raising a son with Down syndrome. God, in His sovereignty chose this for us. I’m good with that. This experience feels so different. This feels so unfair to the rest of our family, to Cooper, and Brady, Tucker and Kelly and our parents. Our plate is full already – with a place for another child, yet not for meeting all of the many needs this child has and will have. Our meeting is over. We are able to return in the afternoon to revisit her.
12 Noon – at City Mall with Gulnara and Zhanat. We discuss the possibility of being able to go to the other 2 babyhouses to see more children. Gulnara calls the Office of Education and we can go there at 2PM today to get letters to visit both houses (tomorrow). Gulnara calls and talks with this little girl’s nurse to tell her we will not be coming back to see her today (to begin our bonding). By doing this we are not closing this door, however, by deciding to move forward and look at other children, the fear has gone. I know that God equips us to do whatever He calls us to do. I know also, that when we take on something that is not for us, it can be disasterous. We have no peace and no confidence to pursue this precious little girl. As horrible as I feel to turn our backs on this child with needs which we could help with – I can see myself sinking in dispair with the thoughts of caring for her.
On ride back from Office of Education, we stopped by a Menonite Church, where Gulnara has friends. Pretty neat to be on the otherside of the world and know that you are standing with brothers and sisters in Christ. This was Zhanat’s, a Muslin, first time in a church and it was fun to hear him translating the scriptures for us that were on the church walls. When I showed a church worker the cross I am wearing, I learned that such things, not made by hand, are idols (quickly tucked it under my shirt!). They were gracious people, offering us hot tea and cookies (all while our taxi driver sat out in the snow). I’m glad we had this tour. Zhanat was able to hear (and translate for us) what we believe. We told the two at the church that we believed that God had called us to adopt a child, but that our journey has been very difficult. The dear man, in Russian, said that he would pray. And I think he will.
Heading to the Café Karagandy to post this blog and send out one more mass e-mail prayer request to friends. Tomorrow is it. We either find this little girl in one of these two babyhouses or we head home this w/e. Unless we have a change in heart about the child with CP and a complete peace in taking her, our journey will be through. I hope not. I pray not. We feel numb, going through the motion, not particularly hopeful, not understanding, not angry, not grateful, not finished yet but weary. If you read this before 11PM your time – PRAY that we will find this little girl. Still believing that she is here. Please forgive us if you think that we are backing down from something we should be doing, in taking this child. We just don’t have it in us.

Wednesday, March 24 – Massive e-mail was sent out tonight asking our friends to pray. Tomorrow we are to go to the babyhouse for our first visit. A meeting with Gulnara this aftenoon makes us more concerned than we were before. Again, we are at a place in this process that I feel it is best that we leave out all details. God knows what is needed to get us to the end of all of this. We just ask that you would lift us up in prayer.
This afternoon, we were told that we would need to move to a different apartment, to one that is more expensive and a taxi ride away from this apartment and from the babyhouse. Such a disappointment since this is the one place we feel comfortable (that is once we have made our way up the 5 flights of dark, urine stinched stairs and locked the door behind us into our place). And besides, what other apartment would have a red neon light that is in a 6 foot oval ring recessed into the ceiling above our bed! I’m feeling so at home, I even ventured to the grocery by myself yesterday afternoon. (Before the night was over, Gulnara called John and said that she had worked things out and we can stay – yea!)
We are appreciating the hours to rest and read and study (John is working on his orthopedic board stuff). It is a treat to sleep until our body is ready to wake up. My stiff joints may be waking me up a bit sooner than the rest of me would like. I am feeling the effects of not exerciseing and also not bringing along enough Mona Vie juice!
John and I have not spent much time back home praying together as a couple (not proud of that but it just hasn’t happened like it should). This morning was the most wonderful time together for us in prayer. If nothing else is going as we thought it should, at least we are seeing our marriage grow stronger. We even started “The Love Dare” book I bought us for Christmas! Things could certainly be worse if the two of us weren’t getting along.

Tuesday, March 23 - Random Things: 3 T of Corley’s Market ground coffee in Starbuck’s coffee press (bought at home) makes a really good cup of coffee (John gets the first cup since he likes it stronger, and I run water back through press a second time and it is just right for me; especially with the 1.5% milk in it and NOT the 3,2% milk or whatever that was we bought that can sit up all by itself – oh the joy of a good cup of coffee. If you want to fit in here, or blend in, wear black (boots, coats, hats) and not the royal blue jacket and bright red coats that John and I are wearing. Do you think they can tell we are foreigners?? I decided to leave a long warmer BROWN coat home at the last minute since Karaganda temperatures (found on the internet) were rising last week. Zhanat (corrected spelling for our facilitator) says that Kazaks wear brighter colors in the spring. When walking on ice – shuffle and slide (can be done very gracefully) rather than picking up your feet. To blend in with the Kazak’s, wear smaller more fitted shoes and boots. If you want to have warm feet, wear the klunkers with lots of lining and rubber like we have. Zhanat thinks all Americans have big feet – ha! Who needs a thermostat for temperature control? When it’s too warm in the apartment you tilt open the window to outdoors. If you’re still to warm you swing it wide from side hinges. I pity our apartment neighbors who are not as fortunate as we are to have newer windows that actually open. Not sure who decides how warm the building is to stay. Just grateful for the warmth. Kazaks do want to help you work through the language barrier. We have not been laughed at yet for our efforts of speaking Russian (at least not to our faces). Before going into the market, I wrote on my hand Yah tohl-kah smart you –the phoenetic way to say “I am just looking” so that I wouldn’t feel like a moron when a store clerk spoke to me (even though I haven’t a clue if she was asking if I needed help finding something.) Still struggling to remember how to say Ya ne poinimayu which means “I don’t understand.” Saying anything to them in English seems to work just the same.
We did not see Gulnara today. Went to Café Karagandy by ourselves and had chicken and rice and soup and Fanta orange (sometimes it is easier to ask for a product we are familiar with) while we checked e-mails, ect. Zhanat joined us there at 1 and we talked him into letting us ride the city bus (30 tenge per person, approx. 20 each) instead of taxi (a taxi is any car with a plastic taxi sign stuck on it’s top OR anyone who pulls over and stops when you stick out your arm, as Gulnara did yesterday). It felt more like “being in the bubble” with Kazak people while riding on bus and walking through the bazaar (or sliding over ice through outdoor bazaar). Only bought a washcloth at the market. Not too into shopping right now since 1) don’t know if we’ll even be staying if our meeting on Thursday at babyhouse does not go well and 2) if we do stay we may be here longer than expected and thus need our money to last.
6:10PM (8:10AM at home) we were finally abl able to talk with Cooper and Connie on skype. Poor Cooper had just woken up (or was woken up to talk to us). Thank you Connie for all your troubles. Also had success in talking with Kelly and Tucker on skype. Will get to “see” Brady on skype this week as he heads to Alabama to stay with the Malones and they can skype.
Ended the evening with 2 episodes of King of Queens and reading. I’m working through reading Russian for Dummies, something that would have been better to have invested time with over past several months BEFORE coming here. Just didn’t have it in us (nor not a lot of time) to learn a new language since we invested in weekly Spanish classes for 3 months (in fall of 07) when we thought we were adopting a 4yo from Guatemala.

Monday, March 22 – Much better night sleep. Up at 6AM to make a call to my mom’s (8 PM there)since Cooper and Brady are with her Sunday night. Cooper tells us she’s 5 now. “Can I talk to my sister?” Fortunately we are now able to use calling card on our kazak phone for only 30cents/ minute.
Had a wonderful time with the Lord this morning and found what will be our theme for the week in Phillipians 3:13: But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead I press on toward the goal to win the prize. We truly are feeling optimistic now. The last several days have been crazy, but we are still here and still able to move forward (and not sitting in some Kazak police station). Hoping that our Muslim translator and Gulnara will be able to see and experience our God who is in control and who gives us His peace and confidence.
10:40AM Sort of stuck in our room waiting for translator to call us. Holiday music seems to be playing out on the streets while we wait (sure hate to miss a party!). Our kazak cell phone (card) ran out of minutes when we talked to Cooper and Brady this morning and we haven’t learned how to add money to our phone card yet. And we found out last night that we do not know how to call out on our apartmen phone (they have a few extra numbers that we don’t have). John gets brave enough to venture to the Absol Market by himself to put Tenge in a machine and hope that he presses the correct buttons to have minutes added on his phone card. (He has success!!)
1PM Janat comes to take us out to see the sights. It’s a beautiful and warmer sunny day (huge difference from yesterday’s windy gusts). With Kelly’s boots my feet have stayed warm through snow and slush. (Pretty funny that I wouldn’t even go out with John and the kids the day it snowed in Greenwood because I hate the cold!) Walk through Central Park where there are tons of families out celebrating the New Year’s Holiday (first day of Spring!). Lots of carnival rides that are here in the park all year long. Wonder if our daughte has ever enjoyed this part? Janat bought us each a glass of Horse milk which is the worst tasting stuff I’ve ever put to my lips. THEN I learned how old that horse milk is (30 days of churning it is why it tastes like vinegar). I couldn’t be polite and get another swallow down. John graciously drank part of his and poured the rest out in the snow when Janat and I walked ahead.
3PM Gulnara meets the three of us at a great kabob restaurant near Central Park . Gulnara treats us to pork, chicken, and lamb kabobs, giant anchoves (John had a rough time with that one), icecream, hot tea. Decided to call this “Linner” since we ate so much and the meal lasted until after 5PM (Gulnara kept the food coming – how could we refuse?) I gave Janat the Philippians 3:13 verse to translate to Gulnara to use as a toast she wanted us to make. Pretty cool to listen to our new Muslum friend quoting God’s word to our facilitator. All four of us are in complete aggreement that we need to forget the past (shakey start at the babyhouse on Friday). The toast is a good opportunity for us to put the past behind and to keep our focus moving forward. We are grateful for feeling like a team again with Gulnara.
6PM John and I go into an internet café withouth our translator. (Actually what I referred to in earlier blog was not an internet café but a resteraunt with wifi – clearly I remain a computer dummie.) No one here speaks English and since we are far from being experts at Skype we don’t know where to begin to ask for help. We get ready to call it quits and go home but fortunately a girl enters who speaks enough English to tell the worker what we need. Did have success skyping (talking and seeing) Kelly. It is the next best thing to being there! Equally frustrating to try and skype Tucker and we can see each other but he can’t hear us. Skyped Connie and could hear her but not see her. It must be how Dorothy felt in the Wizard of Oz as she calls out to her Aunty Am after the tornado hits. She couldn’t connect with her Aunty either. We’ve still got some learning to do with all this technological stuff.
It has been one week since we finished packing on a Monday night back home while thinking “in just 3 days we will finally get to see her.” The hardest part now is thinking that we are here, 7 days later, having made no progress and still facing so many uncertainties. Will the authorities at the babyhouse even allow us to come in and begin bonding on the 25th ? Our morning “pep talks” in the Faith Department are an absolute necessity. We are either the biggest FOOLS to be here right now, crazy and completely out of our minds, or we are right smack in the middle of God’s will. We serve a God who is not ordinary, not predictable, not necessarily safe, definitely not boring, and yes, good and AWESOMELY WONDERFUL. O God, help us know we are where you want us to be.
PLEASE PRAY: 1) our hearts and minds stay focused on the One and only One who is in control here 2) for God to use Gulnara as his tool, speaking only what He would have her say on our behalf 3) that God would remove any damage done from our first visit at the babyhouse on the 19th (from Gulnara’s continued insistance of us seeing our child on that first day). That somehow He would cause them to receive us in a good way this Thursday.

Sunday, March 21 - Not a great night of sleeping for John, woke up feeling sick and went back to sleep until nearly 11AM. Decided to go this day without our interpreter. First venture was to City Mall about ½ block away. Very windy and cold (learning that a night’s snow is a GOOD thing because our snow boots don’t slip, which John experienced on the ice with a fall a couple days before). We got out our handy lamenated Russian phrase pamphlet and pointed to “Money exchange” to the little lady sitting at the mall’s info desk. We were so proud of ourselves UNTIL she gave us a length answer all in Russian which left us just as uninformed as before we presented to her our question. Found the ATM down in the basement of the mall but all instructions are in Russian, go figure. (Probably needed Janat with us but we are determined!) Decide we have enough money for lunch (now after 2PM and we are starving) and head back to Café Karagandy (Turkish place) where John orders cheeseburger (same word as in Russian) and free (frenchfries) and I point to the chicken and soup that has been sitting out for who knows how long. Able to sit and eat and see e-mails, send out a blog (which I type beforehand in our apartment). We cannot tell you how wonderful the comments and e-mails are- please keep them coming.
About 5PM – drop off computer at apartment which is on way to fancy mall across the street where we are able to exchange money (John slides in his American money and the teller slides him paper Tenge and coins). This mall is very expensive. Looking forward to Janat showing us where the good buys are. Everyone here at this mall are dressed to impress (if the average worker in Karaganda makes $2oo/month as Janat says, than all of these people are not average).
Our first adventure through the grocercy store without Gulnara or Janat was successful. Do wish that I had paid better attention to learning the metric system way back in school. Did you know that when it says 3,% milk on a carton of milk it’s very much like half and half – live and learn. Fresh bread is huge here. I was craving protein so had a boiled egg, part of a can of some sort of beans (picture on the cans is helpful) and cheese on leftover bread.
Real bummer – because we have had packed much of our items for our trip to Kaz. back in Sept 08, we failed to go back and check the 22 movies downloaded onto 5 DVD’s to see if they would actually work on John’s computer. Well, the sound part does and there are some really pretty color graphics that swirl around , but NO picture. So…. We watched our nightly 2 King of Queens shows (we have 45 remaining) and one DVD of A Knight’s Tale (which John watched the first night while I slept). An English speaking movie is just a great way to take our minds somewhere else for a couple of hours.
9:30PM Kate calls from Colorado and assures us that everything will be ok - that Gulnara has a very good relationship with our babyhouse director (the one in the hospital now who I pray makes a speedy recovery from her leg issues) and that the assistant director that was with us Friday night at the babyhouse should have no impact on how things go for us from here. We trust Kate.

Saturday, March 20 – Decide to give Janat the day off. Don’t really want to learn about Kazak culture today. Will sit in our warm apartment , watching the snow, eating our oatmeal, listening to Bethany Dillon on John’s iPhone (thank you, Tucker) and possibly venture out to join the New Year’s festivities a little later (while Gulnara works things out). Thankfully, we did get to call and wish our precious Cooper a Happy Birthday at midnight our time last night (2PM in Greenwood). God, please do this thing. You are faithful to equip those whom you call. Please give us courage and strength to endure. We will wait on You.
1:30PM Change in plans – Janat called and says that Gulnara wants to meet us st 3 PM at nearby restaurant to talk. Because this conversation did not go well and we have not had the opportunity to speak with our agency (except to let her know that we have a problem), I will wait to write any details until all of this is resolved. To summarize our meeting without sharing details – yesterday afternoon was more stressful than the 8 hours of sitting in the SUV in front of road closed for bad weather AND our evening before at the babyhouse meeting all (or many) of the Karaganda police. God give us strength to do this. I feel sick inside. I thank you that you have allowed us trials before this so that we are stronger to endure what is ahead of us now. Help us to stay the course. We still believe that you have brought us here to bring this little girl home. Make a way through all of this mess. You are able. Evening with Janat - after Gulnara left, Jonad took us to an internet café where we were finally able to send out our blog. It has been very frustrating not to be able to e-mail or talk to friends and family back home. Still learning our phone and how to do the wireless thing in a turkish café and not have to pay $5/minute on John’s cell phone. Wishing we had brought more/better movies. Watched 2 episodes of King of Queens DVD (thank you, again, Tucker) last night. Have to watch what we have sparingly since our stay has been extended by a week. Don’t know when we’ve been in a place that almost everything is out of our control – not such a bad place to be when you know the One who is

Friday, March 19, 10 AM In room waiting for Gulnara to call from downstairs that she is ready for us to head to the baby house. Minutes before we go, I just need to comment on the calm we feel and have felt since finally completing everything needed to get us on the plane and over here to Kazakhstan. Kept thinking, while sitting still in our SUV for so many hours on route to Karaganda (remembering Kate’s comment that 2 people had died on the same road one day in December from the cold), that God didn’t bring us this far just to let us freeze in some stranger’s car. I have learned, and am learning, that faith means believing without seeing as we trust in the One and only believable and faithful God. Fortunately, even in those times (sad to say many times) we haven taken our eyes off of Him and felt overwhelmed with disappointment and uncertainty - HE is still faithful and good – no matter what the outcome. It is truly a “God thing” to be sitting here waiting, still with many uncertainties, feeling such a peace. And for that I am grateful for the 31 months of what we have been through knowing that God is so much bigger than what our own ideas and plans could ever imagine. Her name is Faith. Call her Faith because it will take more faith than you have known to bring her home. As weird as that sounds, I believe with all my heart that these are the words God spoke clearly to my heart in August 07 and again in January 08 after the door to Guatemala had closed. In just minutes we be will holding our Faith with a greater faith than we have ever known.
10:30AM Jonad knocks on our door and we’re off to City Mall a short walk away to wait on Gulnara who has run into another bump at the MOFA office. Our updated homestudy is not translated into Russian with the approval to adopt a child age 2-6 instead of up to age 4 (as originally stated). As we wait inside a pretty awesome mall, we learn much about Kazak culture from our 25yo translator who lives at home with his mom and sister. He dates a Russian girl, Ola, and neither families are pleased with the mixing of the Kazak and Russian cultures. Finally after 3PM, Gulnara has worked through the bump at the Foreign Affairs office and is on her way to the baby house where we are to walk and meet her.
3:30ish we arrive at the babyhouse which is across the street from the mall. Some of the children are dressed in costumes and heading to a small auditorium to perform. We can hear them singing and would love to watch but are told to sit and wait on Gulnara because we do not have a letter to be at the babyhouse.
4PM -9:05PM we were escorted into a small office with the assistant director. Unfortunately for us, the friendly director whom Gulnara had already developed a relationship with in her prior visits on our behalf to the baby house back in Dec. and Jan. is in the hospital. There seems to be a problem as our first official visit must be observed by someone from the office of adoption and that person was not there. This is a particular problem because Kazakhstan’s New Year Holiday (big deal here) starts tomorrow (Saturday) and will last for 5 days (through Wednesday). Interpretation: all government offices are closed until next Thursday, March 25 and thus no one will be available to observe us. So our 15 days of bonding will NOT start until we meet this child next Thursday. Our attorney, Gulnara, did not feel that this observer needed to be present for our first meeting since we now had the letter approving our start of visits - thus the 5 hours of deliberating among serveral other baby house administrators and their lawyer (with a rapid and very intense exchange of Russian) AND a series of 13 Kazakhstan police who were asked to come and escort us out of the building which had officially closed at 6PM. Gulnara believed we were correct in being there so we sat there as she instructed us to do.
9:05PM with enterage of babyhouse staff and police we peacefully exit the building and walk back to our apartment with Jonad. Not a great start for our bonding but this is par for the course of our quest! Oh what a day which actually “tops” the 8 hours sitting in a frozen SUV waiting at a road block.

Thursday March 18
Flight to Astana was perfect landing right on time at 11:50PM. Actually all 3 of our flights departed and landed right on schedule! We went through whatever you call the intimidating check point of visas to enter a foreign country and shortly later gathered our 180 lbs. of luggage. Gulnara was waiting for us outside baggage claim along with Kadeer who was holding up “KING” so we could find them.
And then the REAL adventure began. Astana was windy and freezing. By 12:30AM everything was loaded in our driver’s Toyota Land Cruiser and off we headed for a “3” hour drive to Karaganda. Ha! At 2AM, after snoozing off and on the car came to a stop. Turns out the major road to Karaganda had just been closed due to extreme winds (snow moving horizontally in fast motion) and poor visability. Gulnara had Kadeer drive around about 20 cars that had come to a stop in front of us and there we sat nose to nose with a locked gate and some sort of USSR guard house. The decision was made to sleep in our car until the road was to open back up, hopefully at 8AM. The car rocked like a boat in the wind while ice thickened on all windows but the front would defrost every ½ - 1 hour when Kadeer turned the heat back on. The posted picture is of the guard house taken at 10AM the following morning where we STILL sat 8 hours later! Got out of car line to find a place to go to the bathroom (several miles away) discovering that the only place that appeared to be in operation was a motel which was experiencing an electric and water outage, thus no bathroom. Drove back into car line in front of guard house and locked gate (this time not as close to gate) and at 12 noon the decision was made for us to drive back toward Astana and board a train to take us onto Karaganda (poor driver had to wait it out). Who would think that a public train station AND a train had no bathrooms?
3:15PM we arrived ( via taxi that we hopped on at the train station) at our “cute” little apartment on the 5th floor - only of course after helping to push taxi that was stuck in ice and snow. Will try and post pictures of our space that has little kitchen area, coffee table, one chair, Russian TV, bed and an ironing board (which serves as a table in the bathroom). Couldn’t be happier with our $30/night set up except for the stair well up to our 5th floor that has no lights (and is rather scary) until you get to our door. Behind a 4 deadbolt steel door stands a quaint and homey one.
4PM Off to Department of Education to receive our permission to go into the babyhouse (little bump in the road in that meeting but all was smoothed out and permission granted) 4:45PM arrive at the Dept. of Foreign Affairs for second approval letter we needed and director had just left. Gulnara will go back there in the morning to complete this step but we were unable to meet our little one today because of this. Probably a blessing because we had just spend 45 hours in traveling, or waiting to travel, since leaving Greenwood on Tuesday. Since we’ve now gained 10 hours time I’m completely confused as to what we’ve missed on the eating and sleeping – just know we’re whooped.
We enjoyed a turkish dinner near our apartment that sits amid huge shopping centers and businesses in the company of Gulnara and Janat, our translator who is new at this but doing a great job. Feeding the 4 of us a delicious meal with hot tea and diet cokes was about $27 total so not bad for a night out on the town. We drove back to the drivers apartment at 9:30 pm to get all the luggage out of his Toyota and haul up 5 flights of dark stairs. Poor translator was short of breath after playing bell hop as well.
Tomorrow morning (Friday, March 19 – HAPPY 5TH BIRTHDAY, COOPER!) at 10AM we will finally meet this child that God has placed on our hearts. Can’t wait to introduce you to her.

Wednesday 3/17/10 – Departed from GSP airport 2:30 yesterday afternoon for Washington, DC. Arrived in Frankfurt, Germany 7:30 AM Germany time, 2:30 AM Greenwood (our body’s time). Without having Cooper along with us on this trip, we actually were able to sleep a bit on the plane. Waiting to depart at 1:30 and lose another 5 hours before arriving in Astana at 11:55 PM and hopefully be greeted by our facilitator, Gulnara. Karaganda (our final destination) is a 2 hour drive from Astana where we will stay in a downtown apartment. We will get to sleep some more before going to the orphanage to meet our daughter on Thursday. Haven’t a clue where the orphanage is but as long as our driver knows where he/she is going it’s ok if we remain clueless. Tomorrow is the day that we meet her, the little one that God placed in our hearts in July 2007 (3 months after we arrived home with our then 2 year old from China).
Quick recap of where we’ve been to get us to this day:
· July 2007 – hours of research on line into various countries and agencies for adoption
· August 14, ’07 – signed on with an agency to adopt from Guatemala. By January ‘08, after losing referrals of two diffferent girls, Guatemala closed doors of all international adoptions.
· February 14, ‘08 – signed on with EAC for Kazakhstan
· September 14, ’08 – five days before we were to leave for Almaty, Kazakhstan our trip was put on hold due to “issues” in Almaty
· June ’09 – we were asked to redo our dossier (and retranslate) and resubmit to Embassy (which we did but never understood why we were having to so)
· November ’08 – changed agencies to Nightlight Christian Adoptions (the greatest agency in the world!)
· December ’08 – new dossier sent to MOFA and MOE in Almaty (total of 6 weeks). Late December – learned about 5 yo girl in Karaganda
· March 16 –the last “leg” of our 2 years and 8 month journey has begun.
Now sitting on the plane as I type, I could cry. It is unbelievable what we have been through. At 49 (me) and 50 (John) years of age, why on earth would a couple who already has a 23 yo, 20 yo, 18 yo, and 5 yo (this Friday) do this? Her name is Faith. Call her Faith.

Thanks for joining in on our journey. We leave home in 12 hours and are not close to finish packing so will "blog" as soon as things slow down. Hopefully in next couple days. We're excited that you're coming along on the wildest ride of our life!